A sinful night
Even after these years that have passed.
Still not knowing what I am.
Am I a human, a demon or an angel?
Maybe I am a hybrid.
Maybe I am a mere freak who must not live.
Why can’t I die?
Why can’t I eat the food?
Why am I in lust for the blood?
I can’t stand this pathetic self of mine
When will I get my release?
When will I be free from this vow?
The vow that keep chaining me
I don’t want to protect this family for eternity
The one I trusted with my soul have died
He demised long time ago.
And here I am, sill stuck in this earth.
Saving people who never want my shades
Am I this sinful?
Am I this disgusting?
Where was I guilty?
When did I become a curse?
Is this my punishment?
Oh, my broken paradise.
I don’t deserve this cruel pain.
Am I forbidden from clinging to the hell?
Am I not allowed to leave this world?
Oh, my merciful Lord.
Will you borrow me your divine power?
Will you take me from this fake reality?
Will you fix my broken soul?
Will you stop my heart from beating?
It pained me.
Will you stop my brain from thinking?
It killed me.
It is what suffering me.
It is what torturing me.
Everyday seems like they are on repeat.
Yet they are so incomplete.
The jealousy and the bias keep eating me
The envy slowly damaging me
Every time I see the people that are stressless
Refluxing on my helplessly iris
This is my sinful life!